STEP 3: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood God.
How It Works
We were now at Step Three. Many of us said to our Maker, as we understood Him: "God, I offer myself to Thee-to build with me and to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy Love, and Thy Way of life. May I do Thy will always!" We thought well before taking this step making sure we were ready; that we could at last abandon ourselves utterly to Him.
-- A.A. Big Book p.63
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Like all
the remaining Steps, Step Three
calls for affirmative action,
for it is only by action that we
can cut away the self-will which
has always blocked the entry of
God - or, if you like a Higher
Power - into our lives. Faith,
to be sure, is necessary, but
faith alone can avail nothing.
We can have faith, yet keep God
out of our lives. Therefore our
problem now becomes just how and
by what specific means shall we
be able to let Him in? Step
Three represents our first
attempt to do this. In fact, the
effectiveness of the whole A.A.
program will rest upon how well
and how earnestly we have tried
to come to "a decision to turn
our will and our lives over to
the care of God as we understood
Him".
- -Twelve
Steps and Twelve Traditions, p.
40
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But other
people say "making a decision"
to do something is only the
first part of doing it. For
example, if I make a decision to
buy a house, I haven't bought
the house yet, and I certainly
can't move in this afternoon.
There are a series of things I
must do after making a decision
to buy a house before I have
actually bought it. I have to
find a house, get a realtor, a
lawyer, a banker, check taxes,
check a certificate of title,
and do all kinds of other
things. Then finally, at the end
of the process, I've bought the
house, and I'm living in it. In
taking Step Three, if you make a
decision to turn your will and
life over to God, you're
deciding. You're committing to
"buy the house". You're
committed to turning your life
and your will over to God. But
you haven't completed the
transaction when you say the
words of commitment.
... I
asked my sponsor, "If saying the
words doesn't turn my will and
my life over to God, how do I do
it?" He smiled and said, "That's
what Steps Four through Twelve
are: the way to turn our whole
lives - past, future, and
present - over to God."
-- A Hunger
for Healing, p. 53
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
We found
that all we needed to do was to
try. When we gave our best
effort to the Program, it worked
for us as it has worked for
countless others. The Third Step
does not say, "We turned our
will and our lives over to the
care of God". It says, "We made
a decision to turn our will and
our lives over to the care of
God as we understood Him". We
made the decision; it was not
made for us by the drugs, our
families, a probation officer,
judge, therapist or doctor. We
made it. For the first time
since that first high, we have
made a decision for ourselves.
--
Narcotics Anonymous Basic Text,
Chapter 4/Step 3
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
A common
recovery phrase used in Twelve
Step groups is "Turn it over."
For the recovering person, that
means turning over to God's care
not only the major, conspicuous
addictions like alcoholism. It
means turning over every aspect
of life, even the small
frustration involved in handling
children or trying to make a
faulty appliance work or dealing
with congested freeway traffic.
In the face of these
irritations, the recovering
person will say time and time
again, "Turn it over; turn it
over; turn it over."
...Breaking out of this bondage
of self does not mean we ignore
or deny our needs. In fact,
quite the reverse is true. If we
can discover healthy,
God-directed ways to meet our
emotional and physical needs,
then we become less needy, less
selfish, less self-preoccupied
individuals. This is another
recovery paradox. Discovering
what our needs are and asking to
have those needs met may be one
of the most unselfish things we
do. All of us have needs, and
all of us have choices as to how
those needs are to be met.
Addictions, compulsions, and
codependency's are counterfeit
means of trying to meet our
basic physical, emotional, and
spiritual hungers. With God's
help we can find genuine ways of
satisfying them.
--
Serenity, A Companion for Twelve
Step Recovery, p. 34,35
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